Going a little personal here today. Just warning ya’ll. I have made a committment to myself to be open about my issues with depression. I want to be there and be honest for other people struggling, they same way I found their words comforting on various blogs and websites.
I struggle with all of the above. Depression has been taking over my brain since I was in fourth or fifth grade to be honest, and I have had several seriously bad bouts over the years. And then there have been really good years. It has its ups and downs. (Haha…little depression joke there). But seriously, it is a cycle. Sometimes I am fine. And sometimes the crazy cycle of doubt, guilt, shame, self criticism, and high expectations is overwhelming and crippling.
I am on some good medicine now. Just like diabetics need insulin, I need help with serotonin and other brain chemicals. And they are working. I am beating this thing. This winter has been so much better than others. The whole year to be exact. I was not created to live in a fog. I was not meant to hide. But to be out there. Enjoying and sharing in life. I was meant to be victorious. I know that God created me to share my gifts–and I really feel like sharing the gift of being victorious over depression is one of them.
If you are at the top or the bottom of the spiral, I understand. Whether you are finding help right now or not, I understand. Just know, you are not alone. I am praying for you and your victory.